Embrace Your Inner Sloth

Embrace Your Inner Sloth

Do you know how to unwind?  Can you give yourself permission to relax and do nothing?  Is it nearly impossible for you to turn off your mind and simply chill?  If so, join the crowd! I’ve been there; still go there at times.  And trust me, I’ve met very few people over the years that have cultivated the ability to relax and turn it all off.  But we need to, oh how we need to! 

Consider this:  Every electronic device we own—from cell phones to laptops to iPads to TV’s—seems wired to keep us on alert.  The vibration or annoying tune of your cell phone when it rings; the happy chime that sounds when you receive email, not to mention the plethora of bells, buzzers, chimes, and other alarms that sound without end around us on a daily basis.  We’ve become like Pavlov’s dogs, conditioned to respond to each of these annoying stimuli, without thought. 

And that’s only the auditory signals that keep us jumping!  Through our visual “channel” we see hundreds, if not thousands of messages daily—ranging from the mundane but seemingly endless deluge of email to traffic signals, YouTube videos, TV commercials, violent programming, and now even intrusive ads in public restrooms!!  The stimuli are simply never-ending. 

In my coaching practice, it never ceases to amaze me how often the subject of relaxation, and lack of it, comes up.  Frankly we live in a wired world, and when you factor in the workplace demands to produce more with fewer resources on the job, and a culture that in many ways, lauds workaholism, it’s no wonder we’re struggling to “manage” it all. 

This week, I’m throwing down the gauntlet and challenging you (and me) to stop the madness; to carve out time and learn to enjoy a few minutes of blissful silence and solitude daily.  Trust me, no one will give you permission—except you.   And because our senses are so conditioned to stay on alert, be generous in giving yourself ample time to de-program.  The first time you sit down to silence you’ll probably feel like screaming because the sound of nothing is so deafening.  But believe me, if I can learn to turn it off and “embrace my inner sloth” so can you!  Here are some tips: 

1)      Start small.  The biggest objection I hear from clients and others I speak with is how they could never just sit still for 20 minutes (or don’t have that much time), as advised in most meditation guides.  You probably couldn’t go out and run for 20 minutes without stopping either IF you were not in good condition.  Sitting, staying still and silent is similar.  Start by observing just five minutes—or less—in the beginning.  This is not time to listen to music, read or journal or practice any other diversional activity.  It is time to simply sit.

2)      Concentrate on your breath.  Okay, I know I’ve mentioned this one a hundred times in these weekly messages—for good reason:  the breath is the bridge between mind and body.  When you breathe and really notice each breath, it automatically brings you back to center.  It calms you down.  It reconnects you with the present moment.  It keeps you alive!!  Oh yea, we tend to forget that our breath is truly life force.  Spend five minutes just breathing and contemplating how wonderful that is.  If you have trouble with that, consider the alternative.

3)      Contemplate nature.  Note:  There is a huge difference between contemplation and commentary.  Contemplation is the art of simply observing and appreciating.  Commentary on the other hand, explains, describes, dissects and distracts.  So begin to simply notice the wonders of nature; be grateful and leave it at that.  It is said that St. Francis of Assisi was once quite a party animal.  Then one night he walked outside, looked up at the heavens and really saw them for the first time.  That moment was life-changing.  We may not become a saint or mystic by practicing contemplation but we can become calmer and more centered by doing so—not bad qualities to cultivate.

4)      Take moments during the day to simply sit, breathe and contemplate something beautiful: a picture, a beautiful piece of music, or a mental image of someplace you love.  Again, calm, stillness and peace are qualities to be cultivated.   Don’t wait until your head is about to explode before you take the time to re-connect.  The easiest way to remember this is to use technology (how ironic!) to support you:  set an alarm to remind you to take these little breaks at certain times a day.  I like to use my birthday—8/20—as my times.  So at least twice a day I am taking time to simply sit, breathe and connect with myself.  Find a reminder system that works for you and use it!

5)      Plan an “embrace your inner sloth” weekend and give yourself permission to do absolutely nothing, or take a true “stay-cation” at home.  Don’t worry about your seemingly endless task list; it will still be there when you get back.  Get over the guilt.  And indulge yourself.  Do only what you truly enjoy.  And if you don’t know what that is, then spend some time discovering it.  Truth is, we need relaxation in order to be more fully productive.  Just as a muscle needs rest in order to grow stronger after exercising it!!

6)      Slow down.  Life is not a four-alarm fire, although at the pace most of us walk, talk, drive, eat and even go to the bathroom, you’d think it was.  Cultivate the habit of doing things slowly.  When you become aware of your breath, you’ll tend to automatically slow down.  Again, start practicing in little ways like walking more slowly or speaking a bit more slowly.  You may find, as I have, that slower does not mean less efficient; it often means the opposite because as I work more slowly I make fewer mistakes, have fewer misunderstandings and actually enjoy things more!  

The ability to relax is absolutely essential to our health—physical and mental—and our productivity.  Most of us labor too much under the old “if you rest, you’ll rust” mentality.  Don’t take my word, try it and see for yourself.  As you allow yourself small but consistent stretches of downtime you’ll begin to reap the rewards.  The benefits will be subtle at first but the cumulative effect may surprise you:  less tendency to get upset at the drop of a hat, quicker recovery from upsets, a more relaxed general attitude, improved sense of humor, better heart rate and respiration, maybe even lower blood pressure. 

There are many, many books on this topic.  Much scientific research validates the benefit of what I’m talking about here.  However I don’t recommend you rush out and buy a book or Google the topic.  Simply start today by giving yourself permission to adopt at least one of the practices I’ve mentioned here on a regular basis.  

Make this the week you put yourself on your “to do” list.  A few minutes just for you, to relax, rejuvenate and embrace your inner sloth! 

Have a relaxing week!

 “Nature does not hurry yet everything is accomplished.”

~~Lao Tzu